I really like these people. That's exactly why I almost didn't say anything. The Relational Spirituality Lab is a small group who have studied together under Dr. Todd Hall. We share a common language and a common framework — and somewhere along the way, that created [...]
1:15AM… and I put myself on trial The 1AM courtroom in my head I was my own worst judge at 1:15AM This is what 1AM anxiety really looks like Wide awake… and losing the case in my mind The night I couldn’t stop interrogating myself Pain [...]
Monday morning, 6am. I'm listening to a podcast about renewing my mind while going through my email inbox with 47 unread messages about why right thinking should fix my life. And somewhere inside me, a voice whispers: If you just think correctly enough, you'll get well. [...]
I wrote in my prayer journal: "I'm exhausted. Not from the pain—from trying to control whether people still love me by proving I can do it all anyway." And I realized: I've been fighting a battle no one asked me to fight. This came after the [...]
10:30am on a Tuesday. Surrounded by notes and open books... Books on healing. Books on nervous systems. Books on identity. Books on what it means to be a Christian woman who deals with ongoing pain. I've underlined sentences. Written in margins. Made lists of principles I [...]
It was 3am and what was I doing? ... I was full throttle into my mental checklist - grading myself, keeping score. I slept through the night? That's one. Led six groups this week? That's two. Recorded and edited videos? That's three. Got through the concert [...]
It was a Tuesday afternoon, and I was listening to a teaching on drawing close to God. It is a practice I do often, especially during this current season of frequent pain flare-ups. As I listened, the wisdom of these teachings seemed to weave together perfectly. [...]
What Sound Technicians Taught Me About Life I started thinking about sound technicians the other day. The ones at concerts or speaking events standing behind the board, always making small adjustments. A twist here, a slide there, never really leaving it alone. At first, I didn’t [...]
Where Am I? Hi. I don’t know where I am. I don’t know exactly when it happened. It started as a beautiful hike. The trail stretched open before me. I had a map, a compass, and enough strength to go wherever the path led. The sun [...]
From Peace to Panic in 30 Minutes: What God Showed Me in the Pain Walking Through the Mess With Him 10:30pm – Lord, that was a hard day. It was uncomfortable and I don’t like how I responded…. That's what I wrote to God at [...]
The Book Club Surprise It was our bi-monthly book club, and I am the facilitator. I made a deliberate choice ahead of time to stay light and be a “good” leader. I would ask good questions. I would help others feel seen. I would get through [...]
The Longest Relationship of My Life Was With a Draft Yes, at one point I had forty-seven drafts sitting in Substack. Forty-seven. Some of them had titles. Some had opening lines I was genuinely proud of. One had a really excellent third paragraph and absolutely nothing [...]
The Day I Said Nothing I didn't speak up. And I've thought about that moment ever since. I was on a Zoom call with a room full of brilliant people—therapists, theologians, researchers, people whose life work had been built around the very subject we were discussing. [...]
The weight we carry Imagine waking up every morning with a heavy backpack strapped across your shoulders. It’s not filled with books or gear—but with rocks. Some are sharp, cutting whenever you move. Others are dull and heavy, pressing down with steady exhaustion. Each one has [...]
“How are you doing?” It’s such a simple question. And such a caring one. When someone asks me that, I know they’re reaching toward me. They want to know. Not what I accomplished. Not what I checked off. But how I am. And yet, I’ve [...]
Have you ever noticed a quiet longing that won’t let you move on? Some days it feels urgent. Other days it’s barely there. But it never quite disappears. I have. It has followed me through busy seasons and quiet ones. And recently, I got in one [...]
Does your mind skip ahead of you? Do you ever start a checklist in your mind before you have all the information? Many of us constantly operate in "checklist" mode. For example, the “checklist” mode may be operational when we read [...]
Have you ever thought … I should be further along in my maturity by now! Why am I strong in some areas and not in other areas? Why do others seem to “get it” more than I do? I've definitely had these queries. However, [...]
Something happened that changed everything. I don’t fully comprehend this change ... but I want to. 1 Cor 6:19 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? NLT* John 17:22 I [...]
Moms are tired, I should help out with their kids… My boss would really like that extra project done… I haven’t done anything for myself lately… My friend seemed lonely I should take her out… Do you ask yourself questions like these? Does it [...]
Do you find it frustrating when you are trying to go to sleep and your mind is racing with many thoughts? Do you find your brain goes into a fog when you want to perform a task that needs to get done? What about [...]
A friend of mine was asked by one of her kids what she wanted for Mother’s day. She took a deep breath and let out a long sigh and said, “Oh, that you children would get along!" Could that be how our Heavenly Father [...]
It’s been an interesting week ... to say the least. I decided to gently observe my responses to circumstances and ask questions instead of being a bully to myself. After all, who wants to listen to a bully? Didn’t your mom tell you to [...]
What does it mean to “experience” God? Do we experience God in our emotions? Do we experience God in our thoughts? In the previous post we discussed how to get something from our heads to our hearts. We realized our tendency is to try to [...]
“I know that in my head but not in my heart” Have you ever said or thought that? Many of us have. Some of us carry the thought on to, “I have to figure out how to get it in my heart.” This sounds [...]
Confidence is a wonderful feeling. Would you like more? In a previous post, we looked at Philippians 3 verse 3. Paul says that those in Christ Jesus, put “no confidence in the flesh.” The Greek word translated to “flesh” can be better understood as [...]
What helps you connect with God when you feel overwhelmed? That is the question so many of us are asking. Here is a story of what I experienced with a few ladies this week. I am so thankful for my weekly connect group with [...]
“Good job.” “Your effort really paid off.” “Keep trying” These phrases sound so encouraging. I mean, don’t we all want someone cheering us on? Yes, hearing these phrases is encouraging. There is also a subtle danger lurking in these phrases though. Let [...]
Have you ever felt your mind was overloaded with thoughts? There is just too much going on in your head! You try to be still with God, either to pray for needs or just be with Him ... and you can’t focus. Or you [...]
Are you facing stress and pressure in your life right now? Would you like your joy to increase as well? Having our joy increase makes all the difference. I have a little card by my computer that says, “Enjoy the Journey – for the [...]
Is there any benefit to sorrow? Or is it just something we have to endure? Last time I left you with those questions to talk to God about. What did you hear? What you hear from God is far more important than what I [...]
Have you ever been confused about what the Bible tells us to do with our emotions? Paul tells the church of Phillipi to rejoice always, in everything give thanks. Then in another letter to the Corinthians, he said he despaired of life and felt the weight [...]
What happens when you “ponder” with another person? In other words, what are your conversations like? Do we find some conversations life-giving and some conversations draining? Have we avoided people that we find the conversations are draining? In the last article, we discussed how [...]
What are our expectations for this Christmas season? Do we want it to be extra special for our children and grandchildren even if that means overextending our time and finances? Do we accept the hustle, bustle, and stress because we want a certain outcome? [...]
God is the ultimate gift giver! In the last few posts, we looked at the gift of His Word and His Holy Spirit. These gifts build our confidence to discern our own thoughts from His thoughts. But how do we know if we are [...]
Is there something we can do to help us hear God’s voice more clearly? Yes, God’s written word will help us recognize His voice in our hearts. But how do I understand His written word? In the past few posts, we have looked at [...]
Have you ever been to an unfamiliar place? It could be a new building, or a new city, just a place that was unfamiliar. Take a moment to imagine yourself somewhere new. Now think about two scenarios. The first one, imagine you are all [...]
The more we get to know God through His written word, the more confident we become in recognizing His voice in our thoughts. We want to discern between His voice and our voice. Here’s the neat thing: God wants us to know [...]
Would you like to know if you are hearing God’s voice or your own voice? Would you like more confidence and direction in these confusing times? Many of us are experiencing confusion from conflicting “news” reports, deception in advertising, and even doubt in what [...]
Have you ever felt like a car that is stuck in a mud slick? You keep pressing on the gas pedal, but you are only spinning your wheels. You are trying to move forward but not going anywhere! And the spinning drains your joy [...]
Hello, how are your trips to the joy filling station going? Has it been helpful to fill up more -- instead of trying to avoid all stress, and difficult situations? Last time we also discussed looking to God and not ourselves to create joy. [...]
Last time I left you with a question: “What does “filling up your joy tank” mean to you?” I loved the response I got from Connie Short in the comment section. She was brilliant and I will tell you why. But before we discuss [...]
Much of the time, we live our lives trying to avoid stress. Sometimes that works. But let me ask you a question... How did that work for you during COVID? How is it working for you now? Between the news, job changes, family issues... [...]
So what happens when you are exploring, and an unpleasant memory comes up? Last time we talked about some of the reasons we stay stuck. We want to move forward, but feel like we are standing still, or going around in circles. Sometimes it [...]
I was talking to a friend about some of the reasons we stay stuck. We want to move forward, but feel like we are standing still, or going around in circles. Sometimes it helps to follow a trail back to where we may have [...]
Is it possible we are making time with God more complicated than it needs to be? When we think of spending time with friends, we don't think of it as a project. We don’t feel we have to learn something or hear something profound. [...]
Does seeing only one step at a time make you nervous? Well, it makes me nervous. I would like to see a lot further down the path, so I know what to expect. Hmm. Maybe that is the issue... Expectations Perhaps God knows that [...]
Sometimes taking a nap is the most spiritual thing you could do. Does that sound a little crazy to you? I mean, wouldn’t it be more spiritual to fight the tiredness and read the Bible? Maybe go help someone or spend time in [...]
Do you know there are people you can reach -- that Joyce Meyer can’t? That was quite a thought that popped into my head in the middle of the night. I was trying to fall back asleep but found myself replaying the day [...]
Argh… why do I grab for comfort food every time stress hits? Why do I shut down when something feels too hard for me? Why can’t I just stop doing that? I stared at the list of common coping strategies that the counselor had [...]
I can fellowship with my frustration or I can bring it to God and fellowship with Him. My choice. Attention Have you ever had a small child trying to get your attention? What happens when you try to move them on or redirect them? [...]
“I just wish my daughter didn’t speak so harshly to herself. I don’t know where she got that from? Her dad and I don’t talk to her that way. “ My heart was heavy as I listened to my friend share. Covid isolation has amplified [...]
